Five Funny Things for a Monday (Not a Politician was stirring edition)

It’s tough being a political blog during the week leading up to the New Year. All of the lawmakers have put away their weapons for the holidays and are resting for the craziness that awaits them in 2011. This will be a politically light edition of Five Funny Things for a Monday and here we go…

5. The Christmas Tree at Lake Eola gets blow over!:Oh, where to start? Let’s see, I guess the Big Bad Wolf was a Boston Celtics fan and when he stumbled out of the Amway Center after the Orlando Magic victory to take a walk. He got ticked off and went to work on the tree here, and the rest is history. Were the winds really that bad? We couldn’t throw some 45 pound weights at the base of that thing or something? What the heck has been going on with Lake Eola park, Buddy Dyer?! The fountain’s lights were all busted, we’ve got swans being stolen and now Christmas trees are flopping around like plastic grocery bags. Let’s get it together!

Orlando's new postcard...Wish you were here..

4. Jesus loves us all, but he really loves Tim Tebow: One of my favorite football tweets yesterday came from ESPN’s Trey Wingo “Tebow parts defense, walks into endzone, Broncos take lead, choirs sing”. The former Gator’s QB led the lowly Denver Broncos’ comeback victory over the Houston Texans. I’m telling you guys, I know football and Tebow has no business having this much success in the NFL. It’s so unusual that it just has to be supernatural. God is looking out for Tim Tebow.

3. Squirrel vs. Power Lines at Disney.. Power Lines Wins: A squirrel rubbed up against some power lines the wrong way and caused a power outage for about a half hour yesterday in the Disney area. Just some quick thoughts. “I’m sure Progress Energy will find some way to bill us for this”. “The Squirrel was some kind of terrorist.”. “Maybe he should have been wearing little leather gloves?” Okay, that last one was a little mean. My condolences to the Squirrel’s brother…Rocky…

and now for something completely different..

2. My adventures in shopping for a hair straightening iron on Christmas eve: It’s bad enough shopping at the very last minute for the holidays, it’s even worse when your shopping for a ladies hair product when 1. You’re a dude and 2. You have no hair. Ultimately, I went with the “Go” model over the “Helen of Troy” straightener.

1. Alex Sink’s farewell interview with The Miami Herald: In what is a pretty well written interview, you want to wince at some of the things Sink says and ask “You didn’t know that during the campaign?” Here are some bullet points.

“So losing sucks. No matter how much you lose by, it sucks.”

“Rod (Smith) and I both came across people – particiulary form the most conservative areas of North Florida where he and I both had done well before, who just said I’m not voting for no Democrat this year, I don’t care who you are. If you have Democrat behind your name, I’m not voting for you.”

“In the past, the only way I could make news and get my word spread was to go to the press…Now, as we have seen, you can totally bypass all that. Why should you go to an editorial board when you can bypass all that?”

MSNBC political analyst Chuck Todd labeled Sink the worst candidate of the year, saying on his show, “The Daily Rundown”: “Think about it. You lost to a guy who defrauded Medicare. In Florida! Okay? More people are on Medicare in Florida than maybe any other state.”

But Sink said she didn’t care what Todd said: “What I think about one person who doesn’t live in Florida and wasn’t here is that I’m ignoring him.”

You know I kinda wish she would have shot back at Chuck Todd, but she didn’t and maybe it was that kind of hesitation that lost her those 62,000 votes.

Have a great Monday…